Happy!!

I didn't know what other title to give. This is how I felt the past 3 months. So happy, that I can barely believe it myself. Yes, there's things that would make me even happier. Like if my kids would magically have no problems or worries or health issues, etc. But, being a realist, I know that's not really an option at this point. So I'm taking what I can from life. And I'm grateful for having had such an amazing three months.


So what's making me so happy? Well, my new job of course! Which is also the reason I'm so quiet on here. I do apologise. When I look at the stats and see how many people log onto this blog every day and week, then I feel really guilty. I'm very sorry. I have so much to say, but I was spending hours and hours on my work last term. Mornings I was in class or in the office provided for our teachers when we have off periods, and afternoons and evenings I prepared for lessons, researched future ideas, marked tests or homework or computer programs, doing paperwork, planning the week/term/year/projects, etc. etc. And of course still spend time with the kids, helping them make the transition to a new school, helping Boeboe with her exam, helping Monkeyman with his first formal year of schooling with homework and all of that.


Even though the new job took MUCH more of my time than I ever thought it would, I enjoyed every minute. Every little thing. Preparing for my classes, presenting and explaining to the kids, marking their books, setting up tests, researching new ideas and projects for the computer science class, learning new languages and platforms and technology, etc. Everything. But most of all, getting to know these wonderful young human beings, and building a relationship with every child.


I feel like I'm in 7th heaven, and so scared that somehow I'm gonna loose this job, or loose the feeling of loving it so much. :-) Silly, I know. I'm already looking forward to the new term that starts tomorrow. Though, the holiday of this past two weeks was really nice. We went camping next to a river for a week, and then were at home for Easter. Just playing games every day. The past week I rested. Slept late, read a lot and just relaxed while the kids had friends over every day. It was good.
So that's all about me. How are the kids doing, you want to know? Mostly, just as fabulous!!


Mr N
He's in a wonderful group of grade 8's. He has friends, he has value, peers are liking him and looking up to him, teachers noticed one after the other what a clever, responsible and good boy he is, and he gained confidence. He's very happy! As happy as I last saw him in grade 4, before everything went pear shaped with the new curriculum and his old school growing so big. He looks forward going to school in the mornings, he likes his teachers, the subjects, the whole setup of the high school. We did the right thing for our boy! He would've disappeared in the big school we first wanted to send him to. Just another quiet little boy. One of 400 other grade 8's. Nothing special. Now, he's noticed, appreciated and stimulated. I need to post more about him, and the subjects he chose, and the school, the Cambridge curriculum, us teachers what we do, but I'll keep that for another day. His report looked soooo good. He has something like 3 subjects in the 90's!!! 6 A's!! And nothing under a 60%! Do you know what that means? You have no idea the relief, happiness and wonder this brought us. I really need to post about this. The whole school situation of our country. A follow-up from my previous school post last year. But not today.


Boeboe
Wow. That's all I need to say. Exactly what I've hoped and prayed for, has happened. Socially, she was immediately accepted and pulled into a small group of friends. They're 5 girls (in grade 6), who spend every moment together. Amazing. They're on her level!! Academically, she has also improved! She now has time in class to write slower, so it's more legible, her work is neater, her books are neater, she already gets better marks because things are explained slower and more repetitively (possible with only 9 kids in class, impossible when they're 20 or 25, like in the previous school), and they get more time to finish homework. Thus, MUCH less homework in the afternoons!!! This is one of the biggest advantages to ME! So I have time to do my work in the afternoons, because I don't need to help Boeboe so much. She's taught in class how to do what's needed, and doesn't need to ask me. She spends about 30-60 minutes some afternoons, compared to hours most afternoons previously.


She's doing so very, very well, that I feel like I'm holding a glass bird, that I just do not want to drop, because it's too beautiful, too precious to break and loose. My daughter is now normal!! Just one of the girls, doing well in school, and being loved and noticed by her teachers! Even her talent in art has been noticed, wow. No one in her previous school ever noticed that, because even though it's one of her talents, it's quite average compared to 100 other girls her age. You know what I mean? There's nothing outstanding in Boeboe, except the way she draws little children to her, and the way she has with them. It's an amazing ability. But nothing that will get you noticed between 100 grade sixes!


It's going so well with Boeboe, that the psychiatrist has even halved her medication. And with it, her aggression got less. So somehow, the medication must've worsened it. Probably when she didn't need the high dosage anymore! Well, that's my theory. Unfortunately, her self-pity got a bit worse, but nothing we can't handle easily. Bottomline, she's happy, she's part of the girls, she's doing well socially, she's definitely showing signs of maturing, academically she did really well (except in history, but we'll work on that). All is good in Boeboe's world. Physically, all is ok for now too. I'll address this in another post at some point.


Monkeyman
The only bad with all the good. Firstly, it's not just bad. He loves the school, he made friends (though more in the bundle so far) and he excels academically. He absolutely excels. One day, I will elaborate on this, but accordingly to the neurologist, we have an extremely intelligent little boy. She repeated it about 3 times, as if she wanted to make sure we really, really get it. He's intelligent. Super intelligent. But, it's something we knew all along, and now see in his work too. We've always noticed it. How could you not? He was our baby boy, we lived with him every day for 7 years. The way he just makes sense of his world. The way he understands concepts immediately, grasping the intricacies as well as the bigger picture. The way he even understand consequences. And especially in the way he wanted to understand and learn. He loves asking questions! Not "why". But "how", "where" and "how much". His current favourite is to work everything back into hours, minutes, months, cents, ml's, mm's or such units. Like working out how many months it has been since Jesus Christ has been born. :-)


He was pushed to the advanced reading group. Since he started to learn to read, it took him 2 months, and he's almost fluent. Amazing. It took Boeboe about 2 years. :-( That saddens me! Monkeyman only got full marks for all his spelling and maths tests (yes, they write tests in grade 1 these days - also another post for another day!). Not even one tiny mistake. Clearly, the level of standard is way below his requirements. But that's ok! I prefer it like that, in the foundation phase.


So what's the bad? Well, we saw the neurologist, as I mentioned. The one that specialises in mitochondrial diseases. The good is, she says he has only 1 marker for mitochondrial, and that's not nearly enough to even suspect it, let alone do a biopsy for it. So yay for that!!! Why am I so sad and worried then? Well, she said she doesn't know what's wrong, and that she believes we can stop looking, since no one knows what it is.


Does that make sense to you? It doesn't to me. He's 7!!! She didn't say nothing is wrong, quite the opposite. She noticed how he was normal-looking at one moment, and while she watched him draw a picture, she saw how the blood drained out of his face for no reason. He stopped drawing, stared off in space and then continued drawing. Being clearly very pale. She believes it's something, but the only thing that fits in her opinion, would be seizures. We need to do an EEG, and I have to admit, I'm dragging my feet. Really dragging.


So she noticed and believes there's something, but if it's not seizures, she wants us to stop looking for answers. I asked her, "and what if it causes something like the pulmonary hypertension again?". And she replied that we need to take him for a checkup with his pead every 6 months. She phoned the pead, and organised this. So in her mind, it's all done and dusted. Do the EEG, check him up, especially his heart, every 6 months. And ignore the fact that a 7-year old little boy can sit quietly at a table and from one second to the next loose all colour in his face. Without saying a word, without moving, without reason. And we're suppose to just ignore it?


I don't get it. He's my little boy. And something is very, very wrong. I know it. I KNOW it. I feel it. I see it. And not just me. His dad too. We discussed it this week again. This holiday... it's worse. Really not going well. He's almost constantly pale. He doesn't do anything, apart from moving from one chair or bed or place where he can sit down. Usually on the iPad or iPod or x-box or such. He doesn't run around. He doesn't jump or anything like that. He has this embarrassed little laugh. Self deprecating. You can SEE something is WRONG. Physically, and also emotionally. So what do we do???? When your last hope, the one doctor all the others referred you to, tells you to "just keep an eye on your son every 6 months at the pead", then what do you do? Where to from here?


The dr also said that since we're not going to do a muscle biopsy, and the vitathion (ATP energy  medication) helped before, we should put him back on it. We did, and I noticed a tiny little bit improvement after 3 weeks. We stopped this holiday (I believe in giving the body breaks from multi-vits, because of overloading the organs. So maybe that's why he's so badly off again? I don't know. We went to a family braai yesterday, and for the FIRST time in almost 2 weeks, he ran!! They played ball, all the little ones. It was wonderful to see. But it took a toll. He was so tired, so badly off, that he cried every 5 minutes. And I really mean, every 5 minutes. Like my SIL said - he was like a toddler who missed his afternoon nap. Some of the other people later came to me, asking me why is Monkeyman crying so much? What was wrong with him? It was clearly very, very, very abnormal for a child his age. What could I say? Oh, nothing...the drs can't find the problem, so we're supposed to just ignore it and hope it goes away. :-(


Peanut
Our bright star. The one that just goes on. The one that brings so much joy. So much laughter. So much happiness to this house. She's loved so very, very much. And she loves so much in return. Every one of us. She's funny! And has self-confidence. And independence. She loves school!!! Absolutely LOVES it. She has a best, best friend. They're inseparable. She refuses to stay at home. Ever. Even when she had a cold, she refused to not go to school, if she sees the older kids goes off. Oh man, she's soooooo different from the other three. My husband regularly comments on how much she's different from the others. You can put all 3 of them in one corner, and she'll be in the opposite corner. All of them in one pen, and she'll be the one on the outside. Emotionally, socially, almost in every way.


She seems to have missed the tantrum stage. Oh, she would throw her toys out of the cot sometimes, but compared to Boeboe, I just cannot call it a tantrum. There's very little screaming, and it lasts minutes. Not hours with voices hoarse from screaming like with Boeboe. She might be independent and strong-willed, but her will and independence aligns with what's expected of her. She rarely swims upstream. She loves doing whatever is expected of her. She loves trying. And she absolutely adores anything musically. Songs, instruments, singing, anything to do with music. They have music class at school, which is of course, one of her favourites. And when they play dress-up or with the old broken computer hardware.


It's such a relief, her being so happy at school. I was so scared, so worried. It helps though, that I don't work all morning. Most days, I fetch her around 9 or 10am. Only 2 days do I need to work until 12. Never later than that, so she really just get to go to school, play a few hours, learn a few things and then mommy fetches her and we either go home, wait for the older children in the car (eating lunch so that she can fall asleep on the way home), or we go to the shops which she likes. No wonder she loves going to school every day! And she knows where I am, never more than about 20m from her. Either in the one class, or in the office or the class next to the office. I once sat in the office with the door open, and she came around the outside where their playground is, with a friend, pointed to me and said: "There's MY mommy." Then she tugged her friend on the hand and ran off, happily playing. She sounded so chuffed. So proud and happy, to have me there. :-) So you can see why I love this job so much!! Who gets to have all 4 her children around her, while doing something she really, really enjoys? And gets paid (albeit not in gold) for it!


And that's all of us! Happy and healthy, with the usual worries and ups and downs. I'm going to try and write up all the posts that's in my head, and not neglect the blog so much this next term.